Sunday, 12 May 2013

The all NEW BC Christy Liberals for 2013!

The BC Provincial election is in May 14, 2013. Christy Clark has chosen her big guns for the epic battle. She found some under the back benches. Not ALL the BC Liberals deserted her, there were still some to pick from. (she was seen at KFC buying the Slim Pickens bucket.) So now all new for 2013, Christy presents the election ticket for prosperity in British Columbia!   Trust us.  We`re the BC Liberals!

BC Premiere, Christy Clark

Sure she looks dazed, but .. but a premier`s job is hard. (is that Basil Rathbone behind her) Look to the future, where you won't have to do anything but listen to what we tell you. We're for families and blueberries and PPPs and surrrprissses.

                             Ministry of Labor and                           Ministry of Wildlife                          Ministry of Welfare
                                 Beer Distribution                                  and Whining                                   and Inertia
                                     Fred Waddle                                  Eunice Shivver                             Harvey Closetted

                            Ministry of Finance                       Ministry of Holograms                       Ministry of Intimidation
                                and Finagling                                and Mysteriums                              and Tax Collection
                                    Al Kida                                    Havanna Marks                               Dawg Bailiff    

                       Ministry of Health                                   Ministry of Ethics                             Ministry of Forestry     
                          and Hospitals                                    and Crime Presention                           and Agonyculture
                     Dr. I.O. Stranglelust                                Kahuna Wakalulu                              Olaf Bigwoody 

So there you have it, our pride and ploy ... er joy. We defy the NDP or the BC Conservatives to come up with a line-up of talent like this. (No that's not him, just looks similar) Elect us again and we`ll get right back to doing the same things to you all over again. 

Our new platform includes; 
- selling Vancouver Island to the Chinese so they won`t have so far to ship their toxic plastics and contaminated foods; also to balance our budjet that we told you about.
- selling the water in our rivers in Public Private Partnerships to collect taxes on toilet flushes; 
- selling Rich Coleman to the Alberta Meat Packers Assoc. (testing for mad-cow first, of course); 
- tolling all the bridges everywhere including that lil wooden one by Second Beach in Stanley Park; (don`t laugh, they`ll pay when we let developers build condos on the west side of the park); 
- cutting taxes on the rich and making workers pay their fair share; 
- setting up a Defend ex Liberals fund for those who got caught and were persecuted unfairly; (or might get caught in the future); 
- fixing the PST & the GST before 2035;
- forgetting BC Rail once and for all; 
- making BC a have-not province for a sixth time, (the NDP only managed it once, we've done it five times!); 
- setting up a Junior Ministry advisory on Atlantic fish farm salmon and why growth hormones and coloring are good for you; and a 'Who needs sockeye salmon?' campaign.
- writing a new melody to the Fast Ferries chant; 
- yes, we`ll even adjust the minimum wage to $9.25 per hour! 

And remember, we don't do French here so Dix is NOT a ten!

All great reasons to return the BC Christy Party to POWER!

There`s lots more where these, er ...  this came from!

I'm Mortimer Snerd, and  I approved this message.
[Paid for by the Desperation Committee to re-elect any Liberal anywhere somehow]

1 comment:

Keep it civil, folks, I know you're angry but try not to swear too much.