The Art of Lying

Well now an election is looming. We're about to be inundated with spin from all the political parties. We hear people expressing their concern over attack ads, and yet others are professing that they work, and all parties will use them.

The first one I have been hearing is about the NDP. The Liberals just can't let go of the Fast Ferries. Telling us about 460 million spent on them. Only 20 million returned with the sale. But someone told me that building those ferries in BC resulted in that 460 million being spent WITHIN BC by the shipyard workers. The BC Liberals sent 430 million to Germany to build three more. ALL of those millions went into German workers' pockets! So which is better?

drill core samples

I heard one the other day disguised as a news story. They were talking about the Chinese mine with the imported Chinese miners, and how the unions have fouled it up for everyone. Because the company, HD Mines International, has taken their initial 30 Chinese miners home again. They talked about the start-up and how they needed to analyse the drill core samples. The Mayor of Tumbler Ridge expressed concern that the unions had caused the stop of construction of homes up there. The construction company owner said the work may not be completed. This was news. They even had a woman holding up a nice shiny piece of black marble that might have been a sample for a kitchen counter. Now I am not sure if you know what a drill core sample looks like, but my memory tells me they are cylinders of granite like rock, not polished flat slabs of marble.

Well was that lying to sneak a stealth message into the newscast?
During that very morning a spokeswoman for the mining company had been on the radio to say the reason the mine stopped work was that they needed to return the drill core samples to China for analysis. This was standard procedure. They would resume production in about one month.
One would assume that the story about the unions screwing up the production was way too good to dump for the truth if you are inclined to favor the Liberals. So the TV station went ahead with it.  Was that the art of lying?

So now we have Probit, a firm owned by Ekos, a public polling company, about to make Robo calls about the election to every person in BC! At an estimated cost of half a million dollars! Suspected to be paid for by the pro-Liberal group calling themselves Concerned Citizens for BC.  (who knows where they are getting the money?) But that's not for sure, they could be calling on behalf of the NDP. They are going to be calling you and asking questions about your vote anyway.

In case you didn't know, you are under NO obligation to reveal any correct answers to ANY polling company. EVER. Indeed, if these kinds of calls bug you at all, this is where the art of lying comes in. It's your teeny finger-poke back at corporate and political manipulation.

Questions may be, 'Who will you vote for?' 'If you're Liberal and will you vote Liberal again?' 'Is the government doing well in your opinion?' 'Who did you vote for last time and who will you vote for this time?' 'Is the present leader popular with you?' 'Is the government on the right track?'
We saw a huge furor in the East during the last general election over Robo calls harassing people.

Robo calls are computer generated automatically dialed phone calls with a message. If you don't answer, they could call you back forever. Forever. But you can fight back. Take the call.    Lie.     All political polls are similar. They seek information ahead of something so the poll indicates a direction for the client to proceed on. The client being the political party who commissions the poll. The results may not be in favor of what the party wants, but polls can tell you how to go ahead and influence the public opinion. Or how to stab your opponent in the back.

So you can lie. And this is apolitical. It spans the process. If you want more calls about polling, go ahead and tell the truth. You will be validating the poll. If you want less then go ahead a fudge the truth. If you are going to vote Liberal, tell them NDP. Greens going to get your X? Tell them Conservatives are your choice. Are you man or woman? Change gender for a day. Your salary? Go ahead, put yourself into that cloudy tax bracket! Ethnic background? Tell them you're Ainu, the Japanese still don't even know who they are! You might hang up the phone with a grin on your face.

voter versus pollster

Do you see? By telling the pollster a lie, you are diminishing the validity of polling! It applies to street polls too. They don't know you, you don't know them, so look them straight in the eye and fib a fabrication. Why are you obligated to be truthful? You could be doing a great thing by eliminating polls altogether because they begin to have no impact. And besides, a lot of people don't trust them already. Some can predict the results of certain poll companies before their conclusion.

So telling the truth to an anonymous person or a political Robocop on the phone is a non starter for me. It's none of their business how I am thinking. As long as they have paper votes I will be putting my X on the candidate who looks prettiest and has nice eyes, man or woman. And it's none of the political party's business if I am gay or straight, black or white, alien or human.

In the polling booth I am honest. Outside when asked, I am a political prevaricator. Almost sounds important, doesn't it?

It's the Art of Lying and it works for the politicians, why shouldn't it work for you?

Elections, Polls and Lying

     The Feds have started their election campaign. May second. The three amigos, Harper, Ignatief and Layton are all about to pretend to suck up to us. Each to blatantly lie about what their government will do for us. Prosperity and success are just around the corner, they'll say with a straight face, get those other people out and our people in! The people I know are worried about what the government will do TO them.
The polls will be polling right left and center. With all the politicians grouping themselves into that center. Man on the street polls. Web polls, shopping mall polls, telephone polls, newspaper polls, tabloid polls. Exit polls, entrance polls. Bar polls. Man on the toilet polls. All purporting to ask questions about your political intentions and print results honestly about who YOU want to govern you and your family. Be aware that veracity is not on the federal political comprehension list.

There'll be Ipsos polls, Compas, Gallup, Nanos, Polara polls etc etc ad nauseum. And by the time anyone in the West turns on the TV election night, without counting a single vote, you'll hear someone like Bill Good in his stentorian voice simply TELL you who your government is. Isn't that speshul?

It's the polls that irritate me. They ask you all these questions and we are supposed to answer candidly to some stranger with a clip board. I would sooner answer to a guy with a bicycle clip on his pantleg and an arrow through his head.
So I have promised myself I will lie to each and every one of them. Of course I will watch poll results previous to my being asked. If the Liberals are leading in my area, then I will be voting for NDP or Conservatives. No question asked of me will receive an honest answer. If it looks like a landslide for the Conservatives I will leap on that bandwagon and lie like hell about voting for them.

You see, if we ALL lie to these pollsters, the effects of polling become irrelevant. No one will believe the results because they might have forecast a landslide win by the Reform party and the Marijuana party snuck in somehow! A gleeful result, get some potting soil!
So the guy approaches you on the street and asks if you will be voting in this election? You say Yes, I will. And who for? You say, (randomly) the NDP. Conservatives, Liberals, the Bloc even! (That ultimate lie is to make Quebeckers think someone outside of the 'nation' of Quebec likes them) Saying you will vote for the obscure parties will be fun for you too. Here you have lots of choices among the oddballs and their silly promises: You could validate them by lying about your vote and INvalidate other polling results. What fun ...

The Abolitionist Party - Whatever they are abolitioning.
Animal Alliance Party - Become a dog and vote for more soft watery food.
The Atlantica Party - They just might find Atlantis with taxpayer money!
Bloc Quebecois - Bloc this, bloc that, bloc anything that doesn't give money to Quebec.
Christian Heritage Party - A vote for them might bring protest from Shinto Priests.
Communist Party - Well isn't China doing ok? They OWN the US now, you know.
Freedom Party - Is there something paradoxical in that name?
Libertarian Party - I read de Sades book, Justine was a Libertine.
NeoRhino Party - It's time we changed from those old leather rhinos anyway.
Parti Populaire des Putes - Yes, I know what it says in French.
Work Less Party - Take the whole election day off.

These are only a few choices of where to actually place your vote in the silence and secrecy of the polling booth. And actually voting for any one of these will probably result in the same outcome of who will be governing you in the next few years anyway.
You see? Your vote will probably have little effect on the way your life will progress after May second, 
Lie to them all, they're going to lie to us.

If it is a sunny day I might just head for the beach instead.

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addenda: Mar 30 -  You saw it here yesterday and now a late news item today, already all around the blogisphere, a developing scandal  - 'CBC caught promoting a rigged Compas poll!  CBC has no explanation for why no matter which button the user always clicked, the "answer" always came out as "Liberal"!

Something is amiss with the CBC and the 'Compass' and that it is not to be trusted.' 

Isn't that what I said?

http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/canadavotes2011/votecompass/
http://www.bloggingtories.ca/forums/viewtopic.php?p=94888